Karen Maezen Miller’s “The Laundry Line” — Eight is Enough

jonkate2The momentary fascination with the reality TV train wreck “Jon & Kate Plus 8″ has me wondering if the sad saga of family striving and dissolution is beneficial as a morality tale. Does the failed couple’s melodrama teach a real-life lesson about balancing careers, money, self-image, household responsibilities, individuality and passion post-parenthood?

Yes, there’s a lesson, in the same sense that wildfires teach us not to throw matches and car accidents teach us not to text behind the wheel. The damage, however, is so dear that it’s hardly redemptive unless we can change the course of our own catastrophe.

“Jon & Kate Plus 8″ is the story of what happens when what we have is not fulfilling enough. A young and aspiring couple finds that the babies don’t come easy enough, the family isn’t full enough, the money doesn’t go far enough, the house isn’t big enough, the help doesn’t help enough, the good times aren’t good enough and the ever after isn’t happy enough.

Sound familiar? This isn’t just their dirty laundry; it’s mine and likely yours too. More than that, it’s the basis of Buddhism.

Prince of a kingdom assuring power, comfort and adulation, Shakyamuni found it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t lasting enough, it wasn’t true enough and it wasn’t real enough. He observed this unfulfillment, or dukkha, as the universal human experience and called it the First Noble Truth. Life is suffering.

Thankfully, that was only the first season of the story. Buddha went on to formulate, practice and prove the way out of suffering with a radical rewrite of the conventional ending. He called it The Eightfold Path. Unlike Jon and Kate’s output, Buddha’s eight is enough. His eight is a perfect fit, and it leads to the ultimate happy ending.

“Jon & Kate Plus 8″ may be doomed, but Buddha Plus 8 is the longest running reality show of all time. Turn off your TV and watch it tonight in your own home, and look for new and uplifting episodes daily.

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9 Comments

  1. Posted July 1, 2009 at 4:55 pm | Permalink

    I really appreciate the way you put this together – such a talented writer. Love that 3rd paragraph; the best summary of the issue I've read (and everyone is writing about it). Thanks for the reminder of a much more uplifting 8 I can attend to.

  2. Posted July 1, 2009 at 5:47 pm | Permalink

    Oh yes, there is always a middle ground, and it's called the "ground." Let's hope we all find it, and keep finding it again and again. I appreciate your eyesight.

  3. Posted July 1, 2009 at 4:00 pm | Permalink

    It's a sad tale, but not an unfamilar one to all. It's amazing to hear such strong opinions on both "sides" of "he deserves better" or "she deserves better", etc. But the sad case is the him/her individuality is what spawns the example ego-centric behavior here, and as a result a flock of children are in the middle. Much like all suffering, I hope that there is a middle ground, and perhaps this show can be seen as an example of society in general and not just "them" and "their" issues….its our culture's issues on display…

  4. Posted July 1, 2009 at 9:24 pm | Permalink

    everytime i read this im loving it. the expression, the words, the writing, the idea. just love love loving it.

  5. Posted July 2, 2009 at 1:18 pm | Permalink

    We live in such strange times that this disaster can be viewed as entertainment. Like Mrs. B Roth, I so appreciate your very thoughtful take on this situation.

  6. Posted July 2, 2009 at 2:07 pm | Permalink

    beautifully said, as always xo

  7. Kathleen Botsford
    Posted July 2, 2009 at 5:49 pm | Permalink

    I've never watched the show but I would have to live on another planet not to see the constant media attention these two (10) have generated. Sad story. Sad state of affairs when instant celebrity is more important than nurturing a family. How could it possibly have been any different being played out in front of cameras day in and day out? My heart breaks for all concerned. Hopefully they will find their way…… You, as always, shine your light of mindfulness into the dark corners, illuminating hidden lessons for each of us to discover in the most unseemly of places. Thank you.

  8. Tracy
    Posted July 8, 2009 at 7:21 pm | Permalink

    I find that big stories like this can be like a gapper delay in a traffic jam or looking at a train wreck. We are all moved to look. I love your second paragraph and the lessons we take from life experiences. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  9. Posted July 11, 2009 at 10:12 pm | Permalink

    What a great post, Karen! Thanks for the reality check :)

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